Okay, so there's this feeling ...
There's this feeling that you get when you've been up all night. If you were busy working, if you couldn't sleep, the reason doesn't matter, but your eyes found you up still come the dead of night. At the break of dawn you find yourself on the edge of the world where you can't see anything but the way the dawn looks after staying up an entire night. It's easy on your eyes, it takes away all the pain of not sleeping. One by one, muscles relax and you sink into the way that the sky is slowly becoming lighter.
You sink into the way that the stars are slowly being covered up, they're disappearing behind a blanket of light that's coming up through the clouds. It's a clarifying moment where there's nothing else you can see, nothing else you can think of. You can smell the dawn when it comes to you like this, fresh and brilliant and the way the world should always be. It completely takes you over.
It's the way I feel when I'm around her.
It's the best example I can give. The world lights up, and I feel all the smaller things, I feel like all the light I'd seen before were just stars that could only do so much to light up the world, and she came along and lit it up with ease. When she steps into the room, she lights it up and she lights up further than the borders, the walls of the room. It's the realization of the dawn, the feeling that you don't see with your eyes after a long night up -- it's that feeling that you feel and see in your heart, like it's slowly filling it up. Like it's becoming something more than it ever could have been or could be otherwise.
It is the feeling of finding that piece of you that you were missing, that feeling of finding it every time you see her.
And all you can do is take in a breath and thank god for the dawn, and hope to never have to see the night again.
This love is knowing that even though the night does come, the dawn is always there for you.
This love is feeling everything relax and slip away, everything but that moment, everything but that delicate feeling when she touches your hand and you slip away from the world for just a second before you reappear, a blip on the map. And when you come back, you're happier -- you're better, and you're ready for whatever the day brings.
This love is beautiful, this love is the beginning of everything, this love is worth making it through any night for.
This love is everything truly important.
This is the love that I love, one heartbeat, one kiss, and one smile at a time. The love that I live every time I wake up smiling and thinking of her, and the love that I dream of when I long for nothing more than her touch.
Thursday, March 15, 2007
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