ride

Let's sit.

& we'll cast shadows in a room lit by candles, sitting cross legged over a blanket so large it covers the floor from any direction the eye can see. We'll drink seltzer water and pretend it's something else, pretend we're those people who indulge themselves in intoxications & we'll pretend we're those people who take one sip and let their secrets fly. We'll sit in arms reach and remain constantly touching -- blanket under bare feet and our fingertips just pressed to skin, tracing the warmth back to its source.

We'll touch fingertips to lips and dip in & together, we'll let our secrets slip as we slip into one another.

Tumble back into the wave of blankets, I want to talk about our dreams & I want to see myself in every one of them with you, right beside you.

I'll tell you how I want to go to Spain, how I don't speak a word but when I close my eyes and picture it I see myself with two tickets poised in fingertips. I see myself taking off with you, everything else taken care of & we take another sip of our own intoxicated dreams and you'll whisper you'd love to, the way we whisper at three A.M., the way we share soft words between kisses.

And we'll share our big dreams, & talk about all our plans and wants and needs and at every stop there will be you & there will be me, waiting with hand held out to take, and we will take it every time.

Always there for the next step of our dreams together.

愛

I can speak twelve {12} languages and their complex words and grammar would slip from my tongue as if you walked the streets of Paris right beside me; I could translate skylines to lyrics and feelings to thoughts;

But my lips are still lacking when they try to get around the words of my love for you. I drive aimlessly next to you in the car late at night, not aimlessly for lack of knowing where I'm going -- aimlessly for lack of being able to properly say what I feel. I rely on movements & ways, I rely on my heart and the way it tries to communicate a message.

Single string ballads & morse code trying to get through the air, trying to communicate a message. Trying to tell you that when I stop at every stop light I just want to kiss you. Trying to tell you that every rainy day I just want to love you. Trying to tell you how I want to spend the days into the future working hard & coming back to you, I want to spend them comforting & taking care of you when you work hard, and I want to spend the days in between work lounging with you.

A choir couldn't perform the way my single heart tries to do, working overtime as it tries to communicate a message my lips fail at ever saying well enough. & I can say I love you, I can say it in every language the world knows, I can write it in the sand but it's not enough & it doesn't fill the sky with love the way your face does for me, so I leave it to my heart & my single string ballad.

I leave the message in the sound, in the beat of holding you close when the lights are out and nobody is around. Where there's no false pretenses, no voices, no crowd -- where it's just the shadows and us, warm kisses and it's been too long between each kiss when you wish it would never stop at all.

And so I do my best to make an orchestra of noise, to sum up all the feelings that may never be summed up, to explain the way I see you and want to hold onto every moment. The way I walk through rooms when you're gone and I see something of yours and I feel a new melody, I feel the way I wish you were there next to me always, and I smile to think that you've given me all these feelings.

Like I want every day to be summer so I can spend the day on the beach with you building sand castles. Like when the sun is about to set and I want nothing more than to run out to the park with you and dash our feet in the sand and the grass and fall over so full of love.

& So I'll sing my great big song as loud as I can and hope that one day it fills the sky, the way you fill mine. The way you smile and my world whips around me and shows me how life can really be, how wonderful it is.